


Wade the Wanker

by LSUsweetie



Series: It's So Fluffy — A Collection of Drabbles and Oneshots [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: #FFspringfest2021, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Fred Weasley Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:21:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29701869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LSUsweetie/pseuds/LSUsweetie
Summary: Will a spelling error be the thing that finally drives Hermione insane?Just a little bit of fun and fluff. Written for Fremione Fanatics Spring Scenes Flash Fest.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Fred Weasley
Series: It's So Fluffy — A Collection of Drabbles and Oneshots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2149440
Comments: 10
Kudos: 54
Collections: Fremione Fanatics Spring Scenes Flash Fest





	Wade the Wanker

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to moonfairy13 for putting this amazing fest together. I'm having so much fun. Also, moonfairy deserves all the credit for the title and for teaching me a new British insult — tosspot! Thank you, my friend :)

The first time, Hermione honestly thought it was just a mistake. But after she’d responded, making sure to use the correct spelling multiple times, she knew that it wasn’t and it was driving her absolutely insane!

Looking down at the parchment in her hands, she took a deep breath, coaching herself to keep her mouth shut. Wade was handsome, kind, and seemed intelligent. She just couldn’t understand why it was so difficult to spell the name of a dragon breed correctly, especially when one was a contractor who worked on bloody dragon reserves!

She could do this, the meeting was in less than an hour and Hermione knew that she needed to get through his reports before they began. Lowering her head, she went back to work, determined to ignore the error if it popped up again. But just a moment later, there it was again: the  _ Antipodean Opallye _ . Fuck!

This was making her twitchy. Pushing her chair back, she rose and started pacing around the room hoping to walk off some of the irritation. How was she supposed to continue to date him without saying something… it was going to fly out of her mouth during the meeting. She knew it would.

A soft knock sounded from outside her closed office door. “Come in,” she called. Maybe a distraction was for the best.”

Except when the door opened, it was him. Fuck! “Hello, Wade, I wasn’t expecting you.”

“Hi, Hermione. I’m sorry if I’m disturbing you. I just wanted to make sure that we’re still on for dinner with your friends after the meeting.”

Don’t be a bitch, Hermione. Control your mouth. He’s perfectly nice. Your dates have been lovely, don’t ruin this.

Pasting a smile on her face, she nodded. “Of course.”

“Great, well, do you mind if I hang out in here until it’s time for the meeting?”

Fuck! “Actually, I was just going over your report. I need to finish that before we meet with everyone else. Maybe you could go down and grab us a cup of tea or something.” Please just get out, go somewhere, anywhere before I insult you.

“Oh, well, I’ll go grab us something before the meeting begins, but I’ll hang around while you finish reading and answer any questions that you have.”

No, no, no. This wasn’t happening. 

Trapped, Hermione nodded and returned to her desk. But when she tried to go back to reading the document, all she could see was the offending word —  _ Opallye. OPAL-L-Y-E! _ What the hell was so difficult about OPAL-E-Y-E? Fuck! She’d even gifted him a book titled Antipodean Opaleyes: The Beauties Among the Beasts. Why the fuck hadn’t he caught on already?

After talking herself down, yet again, she returned to the document. But when the offending misspelling popped up, again and again, she couldn’t hold it in any longer. Finally, she burst out, “I’m sorry, Wade, but I just have to point out that it’s Opaleye, not Opallye.”

“Excuse me?”

“The dragon breed is the Antopidean Opal - EYE, not Opal - LYE. It’s spelled with an e-y-e, not l-y-e.” 

“What the bloody hell does it matter if I misspell something. It’s just one letter. You can’t tell me that you didn’t understand what I was saying.”

“I did, but...”

“No,” he stepped forward, angrily, getting into her personal space, “I’m not finished talking. Are you that petty that you’d get hung up on something so insignificant? Wait, is that why you gave me that bloody book? It is, isn’t it?” 

Tears of anger and shame started filling her eyes, she should have kept her mouth shut, but it was probably best if she learned what kind of person he was now. Clearly, they weren’t compatible. Sure, she probably could have handled that better, but he was being a complete arse. And knowing herself, she wouldn’t be able to promise not to do something similar in the future.”

Five minutes later he was gone. The meeting rescheduled for another day when he could send someone in his place as he now refused to work with her.

******

Hermione debated canceling dinner with her friends, she just wasn’t in the mood, but she knew that being alone would just make it worse. And honestly, she wasn’t upset about the loss of a potential relationship which was eye-opening. She’d let herself get caught up in the fact that a handsome man was interested in her and didn’t pay attention to the fact that they were not compatible in the least. 

After exchanging her work clothes for jeans, she apparated to an alleyway near the muggle restaurant that they’d chosen for the evening. The glorious scents wafting from the tiny Italian eatery made her stomach rumble and she was immediately happy that she’d decided to come out tonight. Good friends and delicious food were just what she needed. Drowning her sorrows in a bowl of pasta sounded like a good plan.

Walking in, Hermione scanned the crowd looking for a group of redheads. But she spotted only one. Fred sat alone at the bar. He caught her eye, and smiling, he waved her over. 

“Hello, love. Where’s your date?” Fred asked as he hugged her, brushing a gentle kiss over her cheek.

“Hi, Fred. That didn’t work out. He didn’t appreciate it when my inner know-it-all came out.”

Fred’s face clouded in anger. “What a fucking wanker. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, thanks. I just wish I’d paid attention. If I had, I would have realised sooner that we just weren’t compatible. But enough about that,” she smiled up at him, “where are the others?”

“What? I’m not enough for you?” Fred asked, clutching at his chest dramatically. “I’m hurt, love.”

She giggled shoving him playfully. “Of course you are.”

Just then, the bartender interrupted,” Can I get you something, Miss?”

“May I?” Fred asked.”

Intrigued, she nodded.

Fred grinned. Turning back to the bartender, he requested, “The nicest sparkling white you have. Nothing too dry. Thanks.”

As the man walked away to fulfill the order, Hermione looked at Fred.“What are we celebrating?”

Winking cheekily, he replied. “Do we really need a reason? It’s your favorite drink. But,” he smiled, sliding an arm around her and leaning close to whisper in her ear. “If you need reasons, I would say that number one is you being rid of the fucking tosspot. But I hope the second can be that we’re celebrating because you’re going to agree to go on a date with me. Because I can assure you, love, I won’t ever get upset with you for pointing out when I’m wrong. In fact, I’ll live for it. Your swottiness is a turn-on.”

Hermione’s heart fluttered excitedly. Yes, this evening was turning out much better than she’d expected. Raising an eyebrow at Fred in challenge, she said, “I don’t believe that I’ve been asked to go on this hypothetical date yet.”

He took her hand in his, running his thumb lightly across her palm. Gazing into her eyes, a soft tugging at the corners of his mouth, he asked, “Will you?” Pausing, he took a deep breath, and she wondered if he was actually nervous. “Would you allow me to take you on a date?”

“Absolutely. Can we start now? It doesn’t look like our friends will be joining us, and if they do, they can get their own table this time.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
